The Truth Isn't Always Ugly

1. “Rose are red. Violets are blue. I’ve got five fingers. The middle one is for you.”—My calendar when I was on vacation

2. “I’m both hellfire and holy water and the flavor you taste depends on how you treat me.” —Me, if I came with a warning

3. “The single star on Texas’ flag is actually a review.” @Sundae_Gurl2 via Twitter

4. Daily Reminder: “You are not going to master the rest of your life in one day. Just relax. Master the day. Then just keep doing that everyday.”

5. “Disliking me is one thing. Being able to whoop my ass is another story…..stay safe.”

Bonus: Have you ever spent a week on vacation pondering the true purpose of your life, while realizing that every few years you feel the deep desire to upend your entire existence? I wonder what will happen next…